My crazy roommate strikes again

I have blogged about my insane roommate and how she doesn't think things through before. So I thought I would share the email with you all she sent me yesterday. All you need to know for it to make proper sense is we have a toaster that has a bun warming rack over the top:

"If you want to soften butter fast for, say, a bagel you are going to toast.
DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT, put the packet over the toaster.
This WILL indeed soften the butter, but will soften it to the point of dripping oiliness which will then do the following:
1) Set Fire to the toaster, necessitating the picking up the greasy, nearly scalding, pack of butter which will...
2) shoot out of your hands like a tiny greased piglet and fly across the kitchen covering YOU and Everything in hot melted butter (whilst flames are still coming from the toaster!) which will then....
3) nearly cause you to crack your head open by making the kitchen floor a greasy deathtrap as you run to soak a teatowel to throw over the toaster (which you just manged to switch off with your buttery fingers) which will....

Thank GOD! quench the flames and save the day! But believe me the whole thing WAS NOT FUN!"

You couldn't make this up. I read the email at work and sat at my desk laughing so hard I had tears pouring down my face. Then I regained my composure, read the email again and promptly collapsed into another fit of giggles.